Beg your pardon?

Me: Put the dirty dishes in the–you know, the garbage can that washes.

14 y/o: You mean the dishwasher? 

Me: I don’t need a vocabulary lesson. Just do it!


9 y/o: I want some hot cocoa.

Me: Take a mug of water and put it in the hot box.

9: y/o: Hot box?

Me: On the wall!

14 y/o: She means microwave!

Me: I know what I mean!


Hubby: Where are you going?

Me: To the big sink. I’m hot.

Hubby: Shower? 

Me: Ooh, look at me! I know the right word for things. Yes, to the shower.


There is nothing more cringe worthy than a linguist, a writer and a polyglot who can’t find a word, and in her native language no less. 

6 thoughts on “Beg your pardon?

  1. This is hilarious. You sound like me. I say this kind of stuff all the time. Aside from household objects, I do it with people, movies, and places. My description of The Watchmen movie was “Remember that movie with the dude with orange hair and the big blue penis guy?”

    1. Me too! I can’t think of an actor/musicians name for the life of me when needed, so it’s always physical descriptions or a lot of the time, vocal quality. I can hear someone’s voice and say, ‘short dude, brown hair, played an ant in Bugs Life.” (We watched Blast from the Past Last night, so that’s why this dude is on my mind. So glad I’m not the only one.

      1. Hahahahahaha!! Last night, we watched Zootopia, and I shouted out “OH MY GOD!!! The sheep is the poodle in Secret Life of Pets!!!!” I kind of had to sit there and wonder why I was so proud of this, and who I really am anymore hahahahahaha

      2. Oh my God, I love her! She was in Park and Rec too, I think, and if you’re a fan of Drunk History, she was on there, too. But do I know her name? No way! She’s the drunk comedian who plays farm animals in her free time. Seriously, tho, that is totally something to be proud of.

  2. Mine, lately, has been ‘bucket’ which can mean anything from garbage can, tote, pail, dishwasher… “I put it in the…uh…bucket.” I don’t know. I also consistently use words like “whatch-a-macallit, whosee-ma-widget, doodlehopper, cattywampus…” you know, completely legitimate technical terms like that. ~ Linda

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