Some back-to-school reminders for all you teachers out there:
professionalclothes everyday and be thankful your pants from last fall still fit your best. All teachers are urged towear cleanundergarments or not. You do you.
- Urinate between classes if you can make it to the other side of the building and back in under four minutes.
- Listen to colleagues
discussbrag about their professional development oversummer break.
- Pretend to Be an engaged listener. No one can tell if you daydream.
- Spend hours Prepar
eing for your classroom at home because administrative staff has packed all three in-service days with hours of extra trainings and meetings.
- Please remember to thank the custodial staff for their hard work over the summer and don’t slide any desks or tables over the freshly waxed floors or they will eat your soul for lunch.
- Cover all food if you heat it in the staff microwave to avoid
unnecessary spillagethe brown ooze that was crusted onto all three microwaves by the end of the year.
- Staff t-shirts
are to be worn every Friday todo not promote school spirit and camaraderie among teaching staffand after twenty weeks of wearing the same shirt, students will ask if you are too poor to buy anything else.
all personal devicesthe voice in your head urging you to seek another profession and avoid usingposting about your back-to-school meltdowns on social media.